A Letter To My 18 Year Old Single Me

Wherever you look, on the streets, at home, in real life or on Netflix – no matter where you look: Love is in the air, everywhere I look around
Love is in the air, every sight and every sound 🎵🎵

Love is in the air, everywhere I look around
Love is in the air, every sight and every sound

And I don’t know if I’m being foolish
Don’t know if I’m being wise
But it’s something that I must believe in
And it’s there when I look in your…

okay but for real tho haha. Well I hope you enjoy that nice song that’s stuck in your head right now.

Anyways, I mean, we literally live and grew up in a world, a society that tells us “you need to have a boyfriend”, “you need to have a girlfriend”, “you need to have a partner”.  I mean how many movies do you know of women or men frustrating over the fact that they are singles?

Singleness is seen as something negative. If you’ve always been single, you’re weird. I mean, how couldn’t you date someone at one point of life?

About a week ago you were washing the dishes, listening to your favorite worship playlist and screaming your lungs out – just the casual stuff – when all of a sudden your sister came in, tapped on your shoulder and asked “Why has no one ever pursued you yet? I mean, we hear it from our brothers, but what about you? Why is it that no one ever pursued you?”

And your mind was like…. “EEEEEEEEEEEHM…hallelujah here below…What the heck???” But then,you  just laughed.. you really couldn’t believe it. You couldn’t believe that she would interrupt your karaoke-dishwashing-session to (unconsciously) make you feel insecure about myself.

Insecure because you have neither dated anyone nor have you been in a relationship with someone yet, let alone have you never been pursued by anyone.

Y’all that moment was a moment of life and death. Deep inside you knew the way you were going to respond to this will pretty much determine how you will feel and think about yourelf in the next couple of days and weeks, maybe even months.

What did you do? You told her, that nothing of it matters to you. It just doesn’t.

You decided to NOT take this road and find yourself in an endless spiral of self-doubt and comparison.  You literally spoke death over those thoughts, you just really didn’t want them to take over your feelings.

Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.

Proverbs 18:21, ESV

Because you know that at the end of the day you are not gonna be measured by the number of people who pursued you.

The number of people you’ve dated doesn NOT define how beautiful you are. 

The number of People you’ve dated does not determine your value in any way. 

The number of people you’ve dated does not determine who you are as a person.

Instead of being frustrated about the fact that you’re single, choose to PRAISE the Lord.

I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.
Psalms 139:14 ESV


And there’s another beautiful thing about the season you’re in: now that you’re free of any responsibility you might have in a relationship (which aren’t bad btw!) And you can use this very season of your life, to grow spiritually and intellectually, to gain more wisdom, to learn, to focus on your ministry and most importantly on your relationship with the Lord.

There’s just so much beauty in this season…don’t be so focused on getting into a relationship asap that you miss out on the beauty of singleness.  Every season in life.

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 ESV

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